Adjust your expectations

Our brains are in the business of predictions – they constantly try to figure out what will happen to make sure that we survive and thrive. Once the brain predicts a certain outcome, it gets invested in it. But if the brain’s prediction of what will happen doesn’t match the reality, this creates the feeling of unease. Humble the Poet puts it succinctly: “Unhappiness is simply when the picture in your head doesn’t match the picture in front of you.”

In our current times, it is impossible to predict what will happen within the next month or the next year, which takes our brains for a spin. This gives us an opportunity to practice what many Eastern traditions had advocated for hundreds of years – living in the moment. We can also become reflectively self-conscious about how our expectations of how things “should be” don’t match the reality of what is.

HOW TO: This week whenever you complain about something mentally or out loud, immediately ask yourself “How did you want it?” Acknowledge the difference between your expectations and your reality. Is there a way to bring those two closer together?